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People Share The FUNNIEST Moments In Their Lives! - (r/AskReddit)

People Share The FUNNIEST Moments In Their Lives! - (r/AskReddit)13 Aug. 2019
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What made you laugh the

What made you laugh the hardest in your entire life? Share your own stories in the comments section below!

Source:

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/9omrok/what_made_you_laugh_the_hardest_in_your_entire/

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Comments (100)
Dabi

When first I have Discord account, I name myself "The man behind the slaughter" and I joined some server, and the bot said "The man behind the slaughter have landed" I couldn't stop laughing ??

Mijou

Honestly,just the tiniest most random moments makes me shit myself

Katie Steele

My freshman year of high school, our indoor winds group was traveling to Dayton for Winter Guard International championships. Before prelims, we had rehearsal at this rundown little 6-12 high school about 30 mins outside the city. So, do you remember when your elementary and middle schools posted signs with stuff like, "Be respectful, be responsible," and how you'd behave as such in class, at lunch, in the halls, etc.? Well, this school had one of those signs; it was "Optimism," and for behavior in the school bathrooms, it had "Use only positive comments." I get that it was to try and tamp down on bullying and stuff, but the tuba guys took it a whole other direction which I'm sure you can imagine for yourself. We could not stop laughing at that alone, but it didn't stop there. Fast forward half an hour, we're on lunch break. Assistant director goes into the bathroom, and emerges…to tumultuous applause led by the entire low brass section. The confused look on his face tied it all together. I couldn't stop laughing until we actually started performing HOURS later.

Band really is such a cult. ?

PurpleJiang

once i was playing minecraft at a family friend's house and we all decided to build a home. After we finished I thought it would look nice to put lava in the frontyard with glass around it but the wooden house caught on fire. everyone in the room was screaming and hysterically trying to put out the fire but it was no use. it was a really funny accident and everyone was laughing that night

TVGoldKght

Since this is reddit,



Keanu Reeves big chungus Minecraft good fortnite bad area 51 Instagram normie emojis are for normies r/emojipolice r/woooosh take my upvote and leave Reddit not normie 69 420 nice because that’s what heroes do liberate Hong Kong nestle bad Disney bad wholesome 100 yep this is big brain time.

Danny Buenaventura

I almost threw up from listening to all this, well done ?

sgx4

One time my dingus was bleeding

Bøbä Têå

My and my best friend were babysitting her little brother while her parents were out, and all of a sudden she starts saying stuff like "fu- fudge! shi- shizzlefingers! and jeez louise" purposely not swearing cuz her little brother was in the room (mind you he was 6) and I'm already laughing at this, and then her little brother just says "what the fuck" and we both cried and rolled over laughing

Endray

I felt really bad on the first one, the baby just wanted to get soda! (Presumably)

Lironata Tobi Ekura

It was one lovely time at discord when there was a (not irl) family reunion
then one of my mateys just said,

"I'm not even adopted." (which is he's replying to me)

and the moment I said,

" If ya were, I could have found the adoption papers."

RC Grant

One time I grabbed a tangerine that I was going to eat and my mom decided it would be a fun idea to hide in a Room and jump in the doorway and scare me. When she scared me I through the tangerine and it landed really hard dead center on her right nipple. She let out the loudest scream as she said it was like a burning sensation

Abraham Lincoln

I was 12 and playing basketball. This one dude on the other team was notorious for talking shit. We’ll call him ‘Tae, because thats what everyone called him. Now, don’t get me wrong, he was pretty good, but everything that came out his mouth was shit talk. Another thing to KIM was that it was drizzling to the point where the court was slippery if you tried to stop quickly. I stopped, and kind of slipped as I shot the ball, and it bricked to the right. ‘Tae rebounded, and while he was doing so said “Man you done crossed yourself, nigga. Drunk ass nigga”. Then, somehow, his brain just...skipped. He took a step, but his foot missed the earth, then his other foot slipped and he ate shit. I couldn’t stop laughing, no matter how hard I tried. It was just so perfect. ???

Creator Soul

The time I laughed the hardest I couldn't even laugh out loud.
In my sixth-grade social studies class, my friends and I had finished our assignment before some of the other students so the teacher said we could do whatever we wanted as long as we weren't distracting because it was a Friday and that was our last period.
The four of us were sitting in the back and screwing around when we started talking about pregnancy (For some reason)
My (male) friend finds this BuzzFeed type quiz titled "Are you pregnant?" so of course he starts taking it. He had his Chromebook angled away from us and the rest of us messed around while he completed the quiz. He then gestures to us with one hand and turns the computer around revealing the quiz result: "YOU ARE PREGNANT!" in bold letters. By now two other kids we were relatively close to were also there with us in the back corner and we all lost our shit. The entire room was silent and trying to work and there we were in the back of the room trying not to make a disruption. Finally, the bell rang. For the rest of the year, we continuously asked him how the pregnancy was coming along

Someone I don’t know

Hi, it's me again. I must be super annoying rn but another time was when my dad forced my sister and me to go on a walk. We went ahead of him and we were just talking. I looked behind me and saw my dad on his phone, and I was super pissed because he dragged us out there to get OFF our phones. So I shushed my sister and pulled her behind some bushes. My dad got off his phone and was super confused as to where we were. Once he got closer to the exit of the path (where we were hiding) we both jumped out and to defend himself he struck a karate chop pose BAHAHA!!! We both started hysterically laughing and my dad was NOT into it. Later that night, he yelled at us for something at dinner and I responded with "Calm down kung-fu panda". My entire family started crying laughing.

Tannecia Wright

At my school we were allowed to hang out in the yard and the playground. We were in the yard and we were talking and someone mentioned falling on their butt and how it felt. I then got up and tried to recreate the moment that I forgot how it felt to fall on my bottom. Next thing I know I'm laughing in pain with while everyone was just laughing. I was eight so it was understandably normal for me I felt some pain but mostly laughter cuz when I got home my butt felt weird for obvious reasons.

Eatmyshorts Noobs

I am the laugh out loud moment

Guido Larocca

I’m here from a depressing thread, making my night better

Lord Tachanka

I like watching this after looking at spoopy Reddit thumbnails at 1:30 am

Catherine Mantia

mine is: I was walking down the street by the beach, 3 year old boy running with his mom, then while running without slowing down, made a sharp turn and ran into the wall. I knew it was so mean to laugh but I couldn't not laugh.

PureSeaweed

in a history class once, the teacher showed us a video of the trojan horse being walked into the city or whatever and my friend calls out "look its the Macys day parade"

Apex 3D

Molesting his face with a pizza stick

river

I know I'm very late and this may not be the hardest I've laughed in my life but hardest for a while:

A few days ago, my boyfriend and I were playing the card game "New Phone Who Dis?" (If you don't know how it works, it's like cards against humanity but with texts. The reader pulls an inbox card and every player gives them a reply card to make a funny reply to the inbox card and whoever has the funniest card wins.)
Since there were only 4 people playing, we put in a random card (we said the random card was the cat's card lol)

Well, I pulled an inbox card that said "hey, I just got out of prison. do you still have the same address?" And I'd made a joke about my father asking the same thing when he got out of prison when I was little.
Well I go to read the cards and the first one simply says "Dad?"
And I immediately lost my shit laughing. Couldn't breathe, tears rolling down my cheeks, wheezing, the whole works. The others are sitting there thinking I'm crazy because they still don't know what it says and I manage to wheeze out, "IT SAYS 'DAD'" which of course makes all of them break out into laughter too.

At the end of my turn I tried to figure out who the point went to and found out it was the random card lmfaoo

My chest and stomach hurt so bad from that for hours and I was still having mini bursts of laughter when I got a phone call from, you guessed it, my father.

Trip Smith

Cake Farts (Game Grumps audio). I was BAWLING for 45 minutes after watching that

Tomy Sonardi

The funniest sht ive ever seen is your job as a tts reddit channel

Itz_ZionPlays

i did the middle finger in my entire class picture and everyone saw it even the teacher

this happened last year when i was 8th grade

Brie Skinner

The funniest thing I can think of right now is I told someone I had a fever, then they just responded “no” and never talked to me again with no explanation

Derek Williams

11:17 that last one fucking killed me ???

dumb popstar

scream queens, watch it, please

Zoe Tremain-Woodcock

this was during a d&d session that me, my dad, my big brother, and my big brother's friends/co-workers were at, and our city "blynnshaw" was being attacked by an evil wizard by the name of carl, and our whole city was getting bombed by goblin slaves, and our dm, let's call him "Rex" so rex described it to us as being like the "Shooting stars" meme, and all we had in our heads was goblins falling in the midst of a galaxy background(we even had the song playing) and all of a sudden my big brother said" And the you See elliot dressed as the joker and dancing"(elliot is my big bro's character btw) and we all LOST OUR SHIT!
and just recently, in a different game, this one being shadowrun, our dm(this time being my dad) was describing how the battle that we had where we had to fight a couple of rival juggalo gangs, and another teammate, let's call him roland, had sent some drones to fight off the rivals(those drones being dobermans, onis, and actual drones) fighting, and my big bro yet again made it funny by having the onis pull a tusken raider, and he said "Guys, she just sent me her nudes! *tusken raider noises*" and then i lost my shit again because it was so outta nowhere.

I B

Why is everything funnier when your not suppose to laugh?

Destiny Braunstein

This made my day

6ix9ine

I know this is wrong but I seen out teacher fart then get up and fall?

Sehun Min

Once in 3rd grade I was throwing my jacket up (idk why) and catching it, and i literally told my friends "what if it lands on a 4th grader" and omg it literally landed on 2 4th grade boys!! its still super funny too me.

Ceiling Fan

This happened yesterday
I was watching a YouTube video it was a gta group video (Bay area Buggs) I was laughing so hard my voice was getting raspy and when I coughed it hurt my chest

UU Its Me Yeees

One of my favorite memory is from my PE class pacer test

It was one of those partner activities where you write down the other's score (very crappy system if you ask me) I was sitting down when I realized my pen didn't work, but the cup of pens was across the room, so I fucking BOOKED across the room as the countdown started to play for the students to start. I managed to make it back in under 30 seconds and everyone was fucking losing it. I ran faster then than I ever did on that pacer test.

elfete xhemajlaj

Here after some scary reddit posts ?

Matthew Lund

A guy riding a bicycle hands off and eating a huge sandwich, front wheel hits a rock in the road gutter and down he goes, still holding the sandwich. His elbows hit the ground, mashing the sandwich into his face in an explosion of lettuce and tomato. I almost crashed from laughing so hard.

Shio Fox

One of the things that made me laugh was when someone in fortnite got knocked down his name happened to be Pantyhunter426 as soon as I saw I started dying and fell off my gaming chair dying of laughter could hardly breathe and had tears coming down my cheeks after laughing so hard, seriously bruh out of all the names out there why pantyhunter.

Axe Caplan

One time when me and the family eating breakfast from IHOP, we start joking around. Without any remorse, I say to my brother: “You have a feminine butt!” Everyone dies of laughter.

Kaeli Grenier-Moses

I once had a three day training to become a sales person and during the training we had to practice on how to talk on the phone. The trainer had us call someone in our family who we felt most comfortable to practice reading a written prompt, which was written by our trainer. He told us to read word for word and just fill in the mam/sir and he/she pronouns appropriately when on the phone. This one guy called his uncle, who by the way, he was living with, begins reading the scripted prompt and the guy was so nervous, he read exactly as he saw. He said "Hello mam or sir, is your husband or wife home?" I laughed so hard and this was five years ago for me and I still laugh at that moment time to time.

Warpzi

That last one tho?

Agent Lesser anteater

I looked at my mom and said

"You know those times when you're 4 and your watching dora, you answer the question wrong and she gets shot in the forehead by the drug cartel"
My mom then said "What did you say" while laughing. I looked her dead in the eyes and repeated it and we both laugh, but I laughed the hardest. I legit had a hard time breathing while laughing.

10/10 would experience again

c unt

I can't pin point a single moment that's made me laugh most but here's some:
when I was like 6 and my sister was 4, we were at our grandparents house for Easter and she was running around the house holding a plastic bag full of chocolate Easter eggs. she was just running around and giggling like a 4 year old girl does. well once she got to the kitchen, she tripped and landed straight onto her bag of Easter eggs and crushed every single one of them. I saw it happen and I started crying laughing, I nearly pissed myself.
Similarly, at the same age, we were at a family friends house and the family friends daughter stole my sisters chocolate so my sister chased her to get it back but the girl was pretty far ahead and ran outside and shut the back-door without my sister noticing. my sister proceeded to run straight into the glass door. I saw it happen and thought it was the funniest shit in my life and I couldn't breathe I was laughing so hard. I ran outside to tell my parents what happened cuz it was so funny but because I was laughing so hard, they thought I was having an asthma attack or something lmao cuz at the time I had a tumor in my throat.
Other times I've laughed super hard was when I was 13 and at my other grandparents house and my sister was getting us a bowl of ice cream and I dipped my finger in the tub of ice cream to taste it and said in a stupid voice "ooh yum!" right before slipping over and face planting. I was wearing socks in a tiled kitchen and me and my sister were rolling on the floor laughing.
Another time, also including my sister, was on Australia day in 2016 and we were at the beach to watch fireworks and I was digging a hole in the sand for fun. I guess I had thrown some sand into the back of my sisters shorts. she felt it and what she meant to say was "ew, I got sand in my undies" but what she actually said was "ew, I got dirt in my sandlies". we spent the entire fireworks show laughing about that

Agent 47

9:02 lesson is kids, fences are d——s!

Ferret Man

The hardest a laughter was probably watching a RT game video

The second hardest was at the end of Monty pythons life of Brian in the crucifix scence

EAK1996

Was looking at the comments of Megadeth's Holy Wars and someone was drunk and instead of typing Dave Mustaine they typed Grandma Mustaine. I laughed for a good 5 minutes at that.

HerboNJ

Bro I can’t fucking breathe ?

WarrenB

I decapitated a redditor and fed his lifeless corpse to my dogs

Week Ly

"whats the age gap now?" fucking had me bro

Annaliese Raviere

My sisters and a friend of theirs wanted to get their conches pierced, so they scheduled for the same day. We drove to the store with another friend and waited in the car as each one went inside to get pierced. That’s when All of Me by John Legend started playing. The friend who tagged along said “Hey, can you change the channel? This song was the theme song for my aunt’s funeral.” But just before we could process what was just said, my sister in the drivers seat said “Yeah, they played it at my dad’s wedding.” Everybody was in hysterics over how absurd the connection was, and it was a good ten minutes before we could calm down

Eugene Lagrimas Jr TV

A couple of my friends and I went to a theme park that had a ferris wheel. We all decided to go on the ferris wheel because it was our first time doing it. Halfway through one of my friends made a weird move, kind of like the move you make when you feel like taking a piss, and shouts “Goosebumps on balls” for no reason. That alome made all of us laugh to the point where we almost made a second round on the ferris wheel. Until now we are roommates and whenever we bring it up we all start laughing.

joao pedro g.

Only people who speak portuguese will understand it

So there's this funny thing where you write a number order on a calculator and then it forms a word. My friends showed me a sentence that formed "Seios", that is boobs in portuguese. The problem is, my calculator makes the numbers look like "10'000", so, it looked like "sei, os" and because of that I didn't understood and spoke "I didn't understood, 'CEO'?" and then I instantly understood what it meant and started laughing so hard with my friends.

gman696969able

Sorry if these are long, but they are worth reading

So in 7th grade I had a pair of gloves, one day I noticed that my shoe lice was untied. So I took my gloves off and put them on the desk, then I put my foot up on my desk to try to tie my shoe. I try and fail several times, finally I expected defeat and put my foot down. Then I looked down at my gloves, almost taking a double take and said oh, of course in a sad and defeated voice. On BOTH of my gloves all the fingers were down, except the middle fingers, ON BOTH GLOVES! And that folks was the day the world decided to mess with me.
(PS. I still cant tie those shoe lices, how do you guys do it? But one day, one day I will do it!)
The world: heh you wish

Tl:DR
I failed to tie my shoes, looked at my gloves and saw they both had the middle fingers up. And still cant tie shoe lices

OH WAIT I HAVE ANOTHER ONE!
This one is shorter.
So at the park there Is the hill that goes from the sidewalk, slopes down and back up a little bit, then bam there's the playground equipment. So me and my friend are riding our bikes from his place to the park, and we decided to cut through the hill. But being a couple of 12 year olds and because of my one leg being weaker then the other due to a disability. When we almost get to the other side, on the part that goes up a bit, I don't quite make it and slowly start tipping over, then I fall, bike and all. But it was slow enough for me too understand what was happening. Lucky it scared me more then it hurt (just a bit of a wack when I hit the ground) and then me and my friend laughed our heads off as I got up.
Tl:DR
Slowly fell off my bike

Mikey Cardwell

Not at the moment, but looking back it was.

About 4 years ago, my friends, neighbors, as well as some of my brothers friends did a giant capture the flag nerf war. I had the flag, and was running from two people. This was in a field with a total of one tree, I wasn't looking until I turned around and... smack. It hurt pretty had, and I was bleeding around my left eye. Looking back at it, I just say that I had really good aim.

angry lolbit

I remember when the annoying kid in my school who was not only annoying but also did bad things like bully people hard so one time he was running at my friend but my friend tripped him over and yeeted him across the hallway. We laughed so hard because he got instant karma and seeing a annoying/mean ass kid getting tripped and yeeted was funny and my friend pulled down his pants and everyone laughed at him and so did I and it may seem crawl but that bully yeeted me aswell and pulled my friends pants down aswell so it was well deserved. I laughed so hard when he ran around like that I cry laughed

folten rush

Shitty content alart

Crystal The Toasted Toast

Somebody on Wattpad having a stroke

Micha Bell

I was 8 mom was 26 mom is french and has a heavy french accent it was at a shopping center mom english still wasn't very good well mom couldn't read wet floor mom slip into a split and split her pants in the process i couldn't stop laughing and aunt laugh so hard she fell to mom try to get up and fell again mom didn't notice her pants rip when she finally got over to us I told her and her face turned really red and she and I have red hair aunt notice and pointed it out which cause us to laugh more

Yellowish Green Dragon .-.

Finding out that my American friend thought Chocolate milk came from a cow... He thought flavoured milk came from a cow as flavoured milk.. This was 2 weeks ago... He is 27.

HotWax93

I don't know if it's the hardest I've ever laughed, but it's among the hardest I can recall laughing. My eighth grade social studies class was American history and featured historical roleplay from the era of European exploration to the present. One of the main parts of the class involved separating into groups and forming our own communities, which were displayed on the back wall of the classroom. Late in the year we had to redesign them (for what reason I can't remember), and one student in another group was ranting about the yellow background his partners wanted to use. At one point, he said, "It looks like a giant bumblebee," and I just lost it. IIRC, I laughed so hard you couldn't hear any sound coming out of my mouth.

More recently, I was laying in bed after watching a Christian apologetics video refuting the Jehovah's Witnesses claim that Jesus died on a pole or "torture stake" instead of a cross and that the cross is a pagan symbol. The fact that they would split hairs over something so meaningless struck me as funny, and I laughed for probably a good 20 minutes. Again, I was laughing so hard you couldn't hear anything. And all the while I was practically shaking and rolling on my bed. Probably the hardest I've laughed since the bumblebee incident, maybe even harder.

Dreamer

Ok Funny Story
There Was A Fire(It Was Actually A Heart Attack)It Was In The House Next To Ours,My Family Was Scared That It Might Spread To Our House,Everyone Was Screaming,Calling For Firefighters Anddddd.... It Was Actually Someone That Had A Heart Attack.Everyone Was Angry At The Guy Who Told Everyone That There Were Fire But I Wasnt Angry Since He Actually THOUGHT It Was A Fire And Thats One Of My Stories As A 9 Year Old(It Actually Happened Today And Everyone Is Still Talking About It

Rosie Johnson

The hardest I remember laughing was today, actually. You know that thing where you take the lyrics to a song or something, and you Google Translate it into another language, and then another, and another, and so on...then back to English? Like a game of telephone? (I think it was Malinda K. Reese who started the trend--channel: Translator Fails). Anyway, someone finally noticed my request to Translate the Team Rocket motto from Pokémon:
Mix without insulation! (prepare for trouble)
Let's do both! (and make it double)
Downstairs! (to protect the world from devastation)
Connect with all of our people! (to unite all peoples within our nation)
I love bad light! (to denounce the evils of truth and love)
Their usefulness is spreading to the stars! (to extend our reach to the stars above)
Someone else! (Jessie)
Iaco! (James)
However, the group's activities jump quickly! (Team Rocket blast off at the speed of light)
Nothing grows smarter! (surrender now or prepare to fight)
Industry! What is? (Meowth that's right)

iiRxinMist

my sister lives at her boyfriend's house, and this one dude named Christian is my sister and her boyfriend''s close friend, one time I was visiting my sister and Christian came back home, slammed open the door and slammed it shut and screamed "WOOOO BOYS" he was probably drunk

- bradli3C -

RAN OVER BY A LAWNMOWER?!

Mecha Man

Snapcube’s SA2 fandub. That is all.

Revon

So a spider got on my shirt, and brother told me and took a paper plate and tried to get them off. But my BFF decides that a better tactic is to grab my sleeve and shake them off. So she grabs my sleeve and starts shaking it. And confused by this, I just blurt out in surprise "WHAT THE FUCK!" See I'm not a causal cusser, I'm somewhat a Christian, my brother's a Christian and my BFF is Catholic. So I was scolded for the rest of the day for that.

Modern Queen

When Henry VII made an entire religion to divorce Aragon.

Serena Lee

My friend had a random person call her. She answered the call, yelled NO, and hung up.
I was doing a front walkover on a beam, only my first foot landed, I went sideways, long story short I fell on my face. No one saw, though.

Baby Demon!! 0w0

A few months ago, me and my siblings were home alone, and we thought that this was the best time to try and kill each other. So, me, my sister (Lilly), and my brother (Brody) are all play fighting, and me and Lilly team up on Brody. We wanted him to chicken out, so we were yelling empty threats at him. At one point, I say something along the lines of “I’m gonna kick you in the balls!”, and Brody responds by climbing on top of the couch, pointing to his pants, and yelling “Come get it!”. Me and Lilly start rolling on the floor and laughing uncontrollably. Brody’s still standing on the couch, not understanding what he said to make us laugh, and me and Lilly are like, crying laughing. We had to stop the play fight cause we just couldn’t take him seriously ?

- bradli3C -

I saw a meme:

‘I had a dream with micheal Jackson and someone asked what his pronouns were and he said “hee/hee!”

Bob Langford

When I was about 12 years old, I was at a sleep over at a friend's house. We were all eating ice cream, and began having a contest to see who could have the best ice cream mustache. Needless to say, the "mustaches" kept getting bigger, and bigger. We were all laughing pretty hard at our silliness, until one of my friends yells, "Look at me." We all do, and he had vanilla ice cream covering his entire face, from ear to ear, from forehead to chin. He was shivering because his face was so cold, and he repeatedly said, "Look at me," through clinched teeth, trying to prevent the melting ice cream on his face from dripping. I was standing, and laughing so hard, that I nearly passed out. My knees buckled, and I landed face-first on the couch. I blacked out for about 2 seconds. I've never laughed that hard since.

bronzeee

do ppl actually find puns like 'that would be an udder catastrophe' funny? Better yet, does anyone even talk like that? it's obnoxious and lame

Justin Sparks

This may not be the funniest moment in my life, but it sure is one of them. Right after 9/11, I was in the downstairs lounge at the Student Union on my college campus. The TV was on, and was tuned to CNN, which was, of course, covering the attacks. The sound wasn't on, but the closed captioning was. As I sat there watching, the closed captioning suddenly said something to the effect of "Osama bin Laden is the chief Islamic toad." I had to get up and leave the room to keep from making a fool of myself laughing. To be honest, though, that was a laugh I really needed, especially then.

Nick Winz

Context: my mom and I both had to get jobs at a grocery store because Covid, and this happened while I was a cashier and she had a day off.

Me: I need to see your ID for the alcohol
Customer: ok here it is
Me: wow, what's it like to have a birthday during the Christmas season?
Customer: it sucks, people give me one present for both days
The bagger: my birthday is on my parents' anniversary!
Me: my birthday is exactly nine months after my parents' anniversary, which means aaaaabsolutely nothing!
The bagger: oh my gosh! I'm telling your mom you said that!
Me: OH NO I FORGOT SHE WORKS HERE TOO!!!

Customer, five minutes later: I love that you're still dying from laughter.

Three customers later: what's so funny?
Me: nothing

I’ve never been that witty, before or since.

Trip Smith

Also Russians be crazy though lmfao. That second story had me crackin up

Finalpyro

Once my friend and I were found a pile of dogshit at school, so we were thinking of a plan for what kind of evil shit we’re gonna pull off this time




All of a sudden a 7yr old grabbed the shit and started chasing us

Selena

The first story should be r/thathappened. Legitimately, I can't tell whether that was real or fake. My sides hurt.

MrRickstopher

My daughter loves shrimp and cocktail sauce and the other day she said, "I love cock sauce!" I was very near death by the time I stopped laughing.

Someone I don’t know

I actually have a couple. One summer, my family and I went to Florida to go to Disney. We were staying a couple days so the day we arrived, we decided to go to eat! I was super exhausted so I fell asleep in the middle of us trying to figure out where to go eat. I woke up to my brother shaking me and saying "Wake up we're here!". I was still super sleepy and my vision was blurry so I could not see where we were. We entered the place and my vision cleared up. I had never been there before and I knew that cause I didn't recognize the place. A woman walked up to us and said "Hi! Welcome to Chili's". I instantly started laughing thinking of the meme and fell on the floor, rolling around. Everyone stared at me and my brother and sister also laughed (Not as much). Yeah...that's the story of how I heard a real-life meme.

Danny

Once me and my friend went to the bathroom and this girl walks in (it’s the boys toilets) and said “I’m telling on you for being naughty,”. And never told on us.

2 days later: we walk past her and she says “you fuck shits,” and she’s now suspended but man what a 5 year old.

Joseph Joestar

so this was in a morrisons parking lot, my very Polish dad was trying to reverse so we could park better, and there was this idiot of a driver that could see us, and just wouldnt move at all. so there was my dad, that forgot he had his wife and his 14 and 12 year old in the car, and just said 'jedz chuju' which means 'drive you dick' and then he realised what he said and my mom started to smack his arm because of it. but she was laughing at the same time so it wasnt even effective. in terms of maturity, we have no maturity.

NH Offroad

Is that club penguin music in the background? It’s so familiar but I can’t remember 100 percent what it is

WakaWaka Wakatoshi

My grandma turned 80 and from literally no where, I just said “yay she’s legal now”






I might’ve killed my family from the amount of laughing that ensued

Krista's Random Crap

Half of these are just white people being too ignorant to not laugh about a Japanese person's accent ._.

jello fish

I got one!
Background: me and my partner are both girls and we have some friends, boy and girl, who are also a couple. We went on a double date a few weeks back and we have been in girlscouts before.
So we are are talking, joking, and we get on the subject of cookies. This is how this happens:
Male friend "weren't you guys in girlscouts together"
Me and my partner "yeah."
Female friend "Hey you two could share girl scout couchie"
We all died laughing while she said "cookies" while laughing.

Accidental Alien

My brother and I cried laughing at Nostalgia Critic's description of the Bebe's Kids movie: "And that's about all they can say about it. They can't say it's a good film, a funny film, or even a film. All they can say is, it's animation."

Tempered Fate

2:23

Creepylifeofme

For mine it was an acting game. It was improv but when the teacher said “line” you picked a piece of folded paper off the ground and said what was on it
These two guys were playing elves and it was dragging on so she called in a third to be Santa
He comes in, booms “hohoho”
She calls for a line and he can barely get out what it says
So Santa, having only just arrived ended up saying
“Hohoho. Santa is in hell now.”
I fucking lost it.

Lost Account

Two stories, short but sweet.
First: Shone a laser on the wall. My cat (about five at that time, she’s seven now) ran directly into the wall.
Second: my mom put a harness on our cat (one year old, now two years old) and she falls to the floor and bites at it. I’m disappointed in myself for not filming these.
Edit: before any of you get confused, these are two different cats. Different breeds too. (Maine Coon and American Shorthair)

jihanluver

we were holdinh a funeral for worms

angus somerville

I remember In an online year meeting at school, the class clown was doing the long game. He was waiting until everyone was silent, then we all heard never gonna give you up, while the class clowns name lit up. It was humilating for us, he just rickrolled the entire yeargroup. But it was so hilarious I almost passed out from laughing.

Melissa Cooper

One time my husband was opening the side door of the garage. All of a sudden a wasp dive bombs him! He jumps back and screams, "Beeeee!" I managed to keep a straight face at that moment so as not to make him mad. Now I can't think about it without laughing so hard!?

kee Maka

In my teens, friend and I were invited to a new years party. Everybody was drunk and when everybody left a few friends and I who were close to the girl who threw the party slept over. My friend Jenna and I were just sitting in the girls room and we play this game. The game is whenever you have a drink, you have to keep it in your mouth and the other person has to say something funny for you to spit it out. We kept saying random objects with the straightest face you could ever imagine and we just burst out laughing, getting liquor all over her bed. We were both drunk and we didn’t seem to care about the mess on the bed until the girl came in and her face was so red with anger we thought it was hilarious.

Tsunami Anakin

I wasn’t there but my two cousins were flying down a hill and a lemonade stand was at the bottom so one of my cousins tires just fell off of her scooter she slid all the way down to the lemonade stand then got up bought some lemonade and walked off

Norm Rayos

Back around age 18-20 my friends and I all went to see a friend in his new play the night it opened. Afterwards we all hit the bathrooms to pee (no intermission!) and met up with our friend to take him out for dinner somewhere.

So I’m driving, we‘re all arguing over where to eat, when another friend of ours randomly pipes up; “Omg! I forgot to ask you guys! The playhouse had FREE napkins in the bathroom! I am so confused. Do all play bathrooms have free napkins?! Is this a thing?? And WHY IS THE NAPKIN STICKY on one side? Is it meant to help you stay clean while you’re eating? Like it’s convenient but I just don’t get it...”

At this point pops his hand up to show us a sanitary napkin he has now stuck to his palm, miming using it to wipe his mouth off!We all LOSE it. Come to find that apparently he had used a female bathroom by mistake. Now I have to explain, this guy HAS a mother. HAS female friends. HAS dated before. But somehow in his entire life til then he never knew that menstrual pads were also referred to as “napkins”.

His horrified expression when we explained what he had just attached to himself...and the high pitched shriek he emitted as he started trying to get it off as we were explaining it’s use, was something I have never seen before or since! I actually had the pull the car over to try and compose myself because I was crying from laughing so hard!!!

Sebastian Tschatordai

The wedgie story: "escapades"
My mind: "asscapades" ?

i n s i g n i f i c a n t

So I’m currently on vacation with my extended family and my cousin is 4. Two days ago we went to a small grocery store and there were these old ladies dressed up as witches for Halloween. My cousin pulled on my dad and pointed to the witches yelling “Look, Uncle Zach, naughty old ladies!” So now we have a joke about naughty old ladies. com.

Mukunda Gaddam

0:58 I will gladly animate this

Philippine WAUTHY

When I was little, around 4 or 5, my mom and I were walking on the sidewalk behind a very elegantly-dressed lady. Without thinking, I whistled (you know, the kind of whistle you hear in movies when there is a beautiful/hot/handsome person) and the lady turned around, and glared at my mom.?? My mom was shocked and embarrassed and she told her that I was the one who did it, but the woman didn't believe her and walked faster to get away from us. My mom didn't even know I could whistle before that moment!? It was hilarious.

Panda Hatter

I was at work and while cleaning up for closing I kept remembering old vines and stuff and giggling to myself, I am usually on my own for my assigned areas so I don’t voice them out loud. Sometimes a coworker will pass by me and give me weird looks bc to them I’m silent one second and the next I’m laughing my ass off

Soldiers Reveal Funniest Drill Sergeant Moments

Soldiers Reveal Funniest Drill Sergeant Moments9 Nov. 2019
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► Soldiers Reveal

► Soldiers Reveal Funniest Drill Sergeant Moments

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Comments (100)
7th Panzer Division

1:58 HE HIT THE GROUND THE SOUND WAS SPLAT THE BLOOD WHEN SQUIRTING HIGH

Dennis L

Nobody wants to listen to a robot read for you.

Jim Hamberg

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Youngest Glock

We were warming up and one man started moaning for no reason

JF Kubissa

A DS asked someone if they were a rocket scientist and he said, "technically Drill Sergeant, I am" and the entire company laughed at it.
The guy left NASA as an aerospace engineer and had a MS in Aeronautical Engineering from Purdue. Still friends with that guy today.

Jim Hamberg

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

jimmy kestler

My first time round after doing basic*had to do it twice cause of infantry doesn't have AIT* in relaxin jackson was doing mechanic AIT.
There's cycles of new soldiers that come in for training and those leaving from completing it...
From the second story to the third story first was for females(yes the army has female mechanics, not many tho)
Anywho second day I get into a verbal match with one high speed fuckhead and I have the last laugh of the interaction and dude storms off. Few hours later I go to my bunk and all my shit is thrown everywhere and my bed is in the hallway...
I snap.
The newbies were out on training while we were back already from ours and I proceed to fuck up every single bunk on the second floor.. I mean totally the shit out of every damn room.
Few hours later we are all out front and cadre starts the investigative ultimatum threat deal they always do.
Well I'm no dickhead and I'm not gunna get the shit beat out of me by everyone for having them get smoked for hours on my part (they all knew but they ain't snitches)
So I gave myself up and confessed.
Spent hours and hours fixing what I messed up.
Then I was smoked til the cadre had to leave for next shift.
Worth it.

John-Michael Franco

I was in right around the time COD 4 came out and I remember a dude asking the DS if quick scoping was the next training we had. Definitely worth the smoke.

KooKooBazoo

the two words that bothered me was safetly continue

moo moo

My favorites was the mesh bag thong and the duct taped doll?? The best of the whole video. I was laughing so hard

Black Creators

We had a drill that for the life of him could not sing cadence. He just had this weird hum he would do. One day the drills had us do our own cadence and when I came out with "oh oh-O-ha ho, it's the only song I know" the drill about faced and walked away trying not to laugh loud enough for us to hear. He was unsuccessful. ?

Dragon Studios

17:45
I want to see this

JET J3T05

In Navy boot camp we had a uniform inspection, the Chief conducting the inspection asked us questions which is part of the inspection. He came to this girl and asked her a question, so she tried to yell with confidence. Though it was too much confidence, she ended up farting loudly. Loud enough for the whole room to hear, and the Chief yelled, “ Damn! Torpedo hit port side!” Our RDCs tried to hold in their laughter and ran out to the hall, which then we heard them burst out laughing. This caused us to all laugh. The Chief chuckled but had to continue and said it wasn’t that funny. This was one of the funniest moments in bootcamp to me!

TenTonNuke

There was a guy in basic training who had a high pitched whiny voice and was built like Humpty Dumpty. He was pretty much useless at everything. Out on the rifle range, he's lying prone, not firing a shot, rocking forward and back, making weird grunting noises. The drill sergeant yells, "Fire! What are you waiting for?" And he yells in his high pitched voice, "All I see is GRAAAAASS drill sergeant!" because he was so useless he couldn't lift his head high enough off the ground to see above the grass. The drill sergeant tried to cover his laughter, but he just looked to the side and said something like, "Well... goddamn, Private!"

CoyBoat 275

Starts falling
AIR ASSAULT!

nominee0

Omg a happy sock...i wish i could've seen that smoking.

Patrick Lanclos

This isn't a Basic Training story, but is a story from my Air Force Technical Training days. After Basic Training in the Air Force, you went forward to your assigned technical training school, to learn the job which you will be performing for the rest of the term of your enlistment. I was in training for Computer Maintenance at Keesler Air Force Base, in Biloxi, Mississippi.

The Uniform of the Day for technical training was usually the basic Air Force dark blue pants, with light blue short-sleeved shirt, and flight cap. The instructors usually wore the same.

We had this one instructor, whom I called "The Scratcher," because he was forever scratching his nuts. Of course, he could not do this in front of a class that contained female trainees, so he would slyly saunter on over behind the podium and scratch away.

One day, as he was writing on the chalkboard, he felt the need to scratch. So again, he would move over to the podium to scratch. When he moved out from behind the podium, the whole class busted out laughing. He asked what was going on, but no one spoke up. He just shook his head and continued writing.

This scenario repeated over and over, until he had enough of our outbursts, with no explanation as to why we were laughing. He told us to go on break and come back with new attitudes, or else!

When we returned from break, we saw that someone had gone to the chalkboard and left a message for the instructor. As we seated ourselves, the instructor came back into the classroom and read the message. Someone had written "Confucius say .... Man who wear dark blue pant, and write with chalk, should not scratch nuts behind podium."

The instructor looked down at the front of his pants and saw all the chalk powder finger prints. His face instantly turned beet-red. He immediately scooted out the door, and down the hall, to ask his supervisor for the rest of the day off.

Raymond Hamill

Okay so while I was in basic at Fort Jackson we were getting our barracks ready for inspection before we went to sleep, our Drill Sgt walked in and said why does second platoons bay smell like muscle rub and our bay smell like ball sack? We had a soldier say because 2and platoon doesn't have balls the Drill Sgt stopped in the middle of the room and smiled and had to hold in laughter.

Chance Kruse

the first one?

schlontz84

190 meters tall....so you got drilled by a kaju???

anonymizzle

Lmao “have them sharpied on with a new expression every day”???

Bald Vertebrate

Private! take your pants off im gonna show you why i was called the drill sergeant

Jim Hamberg

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Low Level Content

pooh-say

Doctor Discord

10:42 is a damn good comeback.

Penguin Gaming

The equable punishment ipsilaterally spray because distance partially question without a rainy cotton. knotty, rude storm

NewPaccWhoDis

“Stop being a poosay”

Hanna Edwards

“AIR ASSSAAAAAAAAAULT- thunk” lmao

Rebecca Doud

At basic training we had just finished getting yelled at for the typical nonsense in the day room. I was directly in front and center of the drills desk in formation when he points at me and tells me to pass out the mail for him bc he’s done with us. As I slightly bend to pick it up, the loudest and longest fart I’ve ever ripped involuntarily leaves my body with massive force and I hear a couple of gasps behind me. I look up hesitantly preparing to be reamed when I see the drills face twist, he can barely utter the words “you disgust me” without smiling as he power walks for the door in what I can imagine was a strained effort not to burst out laughing. At least I didn’t get in trouble.

Jagna Glowaczewska

0:57 190 meters? dude's as tall as a building xd

only charles

me looking for the background music bc the link won't work ?

Adam Svensson

190 meters, damn...

kirishima

0:39 "he was 190 meters tall" Are we in attack on titan now?

Positivity CIS

15:45 I'm laughing so hard

Bread Toast

Once I went into the bathroom and someone tried to flush a bag of fucking takis down the toilet. I still wonder who did it today

Fret N

Hi

Elton Burns

Dude the military would hate me man. I'd get off on making drill Sargeants mad.

Raisins

They had the whole squad laughing.

RepeatingImp72

In my bootcamp we had a guy who shaved his eyebrows off for no reason

Jim Hamberg

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Big Behz Cr1tic

Hi

succclollipop

I was talking in formation telling the divisions new MA how to March for graduation and the RDC yelled at me and some spit got on my face. I kept my bearing while he yelled at us and then he quietly apologized. I told him I deserved it and he said even the worst dude in the division didn't deserve that. I said, "at least your breath doesn't stink", and all military bearing went straight out the window.

Jim Hamberg

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Mikasa Ackerman

My sister's wife only complains about wannabe darwin award contestants.
Like standing behind things you should not stand behind unless ya wanna get roasted.

inu222003

I'm a male, the first time I got mail the drill sergeants found out my first name is Ashley. All the drill sergeants laughed it up, it's really not that funny, they were forcing it to make me feel stupid. Needless to say I was the only private who was called by their first name for the rest of basic .... And I loved every moment it and those drill sergeants. What he actually said:
"Ashley! Your name is fucking Ashley?!? That's as bad as being named Sara. You better go home and slap you momma for naming you that. Get back in formation...Ashley!

Stefan Barrios

During one of our trainings, we were sitting in front of the fire, when the DS stood up an stumped on someone foot, ds apologized but the private thought it was another soldier and not the DS, so he insulted him joking, DS "what?"
Private "oh shit, sorry DS i thought it was says the name of another soldier

Sean Ramey

Man do I have some funny stories from basic. Have of the things in this video I can relate to.

Lucía 2792

My dad's story:

So when he did military service everyone had a fork, a knife and a spoon for themselves, and they had to keep them clean and so. They ended in a hook shape so you would just hook them up on your belt and have them on you all day
Well the letrines were literally a hole on the floor, squat and show the world what you got, you know. Problem is, my dad's friend lost his cutlery while doing a 2, and he had to get his hand on the mess to get it back
Ever since then, everyone would keep a close eye on their cutlery when the friend was near so he wouldn't swap the cutlery. One day the superiors heard him complain about how the food tasted like shit, and apparently they lost theirs when they heard his explanation lol

Bata Gamez

The first one is cruel lmao

Jim Hamberg

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Unnecessary Foe

I was at Navy Medic. There was this guy black Navy men walking all feminine. Whenever we see Navymen, Women, Drill Instructor or a lady marine. We supposed to greet with a proper greeting. So one of the recruits yelled out "GOOD MORNING MAAM". The gay Navymen looked back and was waving his finger at him. I laughed my ass off. This had nothing to do with Drill Sergeant or Instructor, but I thought I should tell this story.

Jim Hamberg

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Charlie Hurley

this shit would be a lot more enjoyable if that narrated voice wasn’t a robot.

Carl Franz

Ever have that nightmare, years later, that you're still in boot?

Jim Hamberg

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Azalea Adair

That 190 meter tall one was just a wee lad

Alex FRD

This is a story a Marine told me back in the DEP:
"We had this gullible recruit in Basic who was told by another recruit that eating orange peels was as healthy as eating the actual orange. One of the drill instructors came up and asked "Private, what the Hell are you doing?" The recruit responded "Sir, the Private was told that eating orange peels was healthy, Sir!" The drill instructor took his cover off and placed it over his face and powerwalked out of the Mess, suppressing his laughter all the way."

overbanked

"Thanks Drill Sergeant!" "Don't thank me, thank your recruiter!"

Unsettling_bread451

So your telling me one of those guys was 621 feet tall damn I know drill sergeants are big but that’s tall

Jim Hamberg

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Jim Hamberg

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Blood Thorn

*DUMBUSS*... wow

VenerableFox

I hope that’s the same red headed Air Force MTI that aided our main MTI all the time at the 331st TRS. I fucked up and called her sir a few times when she was in to which she always responded “DID I FORGET TO WEAR MY PENIS TO WORK TODAY!”

Leo O'Ryan

Good God! One of the drill instructors was over 600ft tall and he just glances over that fact!?!??!?

Johnathan Roan

One time my sister flight MTI was leaving work in his PT clothes and had this big lunch bag. He was like 40 meters away and somebody was talking in line. This man nearly broke his neck looking, threw his lunch back away and took off full sprint and said “HEY YOU!” I almost lost my my mind laughing the way he turned yeeted his lunch ? it also made me chuckle when someone accidentally made eye contact with them and they were like “What!? I didn’t know you. I don’t owe you no damn money!” One girl asked what time it was because a lot of people had watches and the dude from the first story was like “WHAT?! YOU GOT A HOT DATE TRAINEE?!” Time mattered because we were just trying to make it to each meal.

Spartan Goku

190 meters tall and he’s a Drill Sergeant?
Just send him and the War on Terror will be over in a day!

Nanner Dunlocke

"Soldiers of Reddit..."

Diego Cruz

190 meters tall ?

HyRexxhFR

0:51 "Hes 190 meters tall"

Connie Clausen

“Um, you’re looking nice today sir” ?

MadGamerBoss

“we were smoked into Oblivion"????

Jim Hamberg

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Simon W

190 meters... are you sure about that

kombot marine

My drill instructor got in my face and screamed did my mom have any children that survived I yelled SIR NO SIR this recruite is adopted his mother couldnt have kids!!! He opened his mouth to scream at me relised what I had said had no reply and quickly stormed off to the duty hut we could see him shaking trying to hold in his laughter

OakesDT

Dumbis

Adrian Montoya

Happy sock got me

Kaka Natre

First time marching
Everyone of them laugh ?

Levi Minnis

I had a guy in BCT from Indiana who was 6’11” pissing him off would grant you a size 16 boot in the face

Tyrone Jones

How does one take a female drill sargeant seriously i mean come on...m

oyasumii

2:15
3:37
15:45

NoThankYou

Y’all wanna know what happy sock is?

Jäger Meister_175

My Sargeant in basic was the meanest looking guy I've ever seen, however, whenever getting the troop to come to attention, he'd yell in a high pitched voice "TROOOOOOOOOOOOOOP" it was hilarious, when we were practicing our marching, we'd all mimic this, always got a smile on everyone's face

E TR

I really wanna watch this video but i dont listen english very well :(

NextHigh productions

I need to hear the marines that got caught high off weed

Brendon Dobbs

We were at land nav, a guy had to shit so he shit in the woods. DS got word of it and yelled at him to pick it up with his bare hands and throw it in the porta shitter while hes holding back trying not to laugh but smiling.

Morten Fransrud

190 meters tall... Jesus

jerlstif

That compliment story killed lolololol

GABRIAN BURTON

4:10 didn't expect that lololol

Ryan M

190 meters tall? Damn.

Jim Hamberg

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

The Piss Man

“Jimmy, tell your mooom to put more anal vids on her Onlyfans”

“WHO THE FUCK SAID THAT”

Brett Ullman

pubg

Trung Cyf

Why is this even a video? its a slideshow from a reddit post ?

Asura

Happy sock hit the ds in the face im dying

Hentai Guy

1989 fort Sill Georgia. My dad was on his first base jump. There was a 6 foot something, black drill Sargent yelling at a guy who refused to jump. The Sargent grabbed his nuts and yelled "Private, if you don't jump out of this plane, I'll stick this in your ass!" The private jumped but didn't take off the tether. My dad, another guy and the private were hanging out of the plane while the Sargent was laughing. My dad was getting his ass whooped by the turbulence and broke his glasses. He cannot see anything without his coke bottle glasses. Eventually they were rescued and successfully did his first base jump.

Jackson Fuller

The eyebrows one got me ???

Ryan Breaker

For getting millions of views on stolen content, this sure is lazy audio editing.

Jim Hamberg

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Michaela Walton

"thanks for my first gold! I shall name him Phillip"

You Tube

17:39 I’m able to do that.....